Mark Megahan
This fictitious account was related by a friend with a Guy Fawkes mask, entirely for your adult enjoyment. Don’t read it if it’s illegal to do so in your jurisdiction. “The thing about acid is that an hour later you start to feel it,” my college buddy began. He said it about an hour after I put a little square piece of paper – with Joe Cool Snoopy printed on it – on my tongue, to tattoo itself into my brain for my very first time ever.
Acid is a one way trip
I took his word for it but I wasn’t feeling much, other than a little apprehension. “By the second hour you really feel it,” he continued. “At like three hours on the dot, the world will go electric.” He called that “the peak.” After that, he assured, “you’ll start to come down a little but if you smoke some pot, you go right back up.” That’s not all. Weed “lifts you back up but not quite as much as you were before.” Smoke some more pot, back up, but not as much… “for the rest of your life.” If he told me that before I took it I still would have dropped.
I later learned you really can’t overdose on psychedelics. Even when you mix and match. That night we watched dumbo as Quadrophenia played on the stereo. After that, we walked a classmate home nearby, during what can only be described as an electric snowstorm. The flakes were coming down like fireworks on the fourth of July with laser streamers trailing behind.
I got the blotter from a guy at our school who sold grass in the park. He wasn’t like the other dealers in the park who sold grams in little brown paper envelopes which you couldn’t get a look at before you bought. Mr. Friendly (we’ll call him) sold real baggies full of honest kick ass sticky buds. If you bothered to throw one on a scale it would always weigh over.
“I believe in mountain measurements” was his motto. It earned him all the business he could handle. He felt that way about the acid too. And the coke. One day I was buying a bag of weed off him and he asked what I was doing the next day. It turned out he needed a patsy but he didn’t tell me that.
He needed someone to hold a bottle of acid and drip it out on sugar cubes as it sold. He told me the part about how it leaks through your skin but not how much goes through. Holding the bottle through a day of dealing is the equivalent to about 20 doses. I liked it. We did that once a month for a couple months, taking turns day-by-day until it ran out, which never went more than three days.
One would hold the money, the other the bottle, then switch. Thing thing about cubes is you pretty much have to dose on the spot. One guy said drop it in my eye. That’s NOT recommended at all by the way. His eye bugged out and looked like it was going to explode. For like a week.We came up with a better idea. Make our own blotter. We stuck with the mountain measurements concept and our standard dose was about 3 times stronger than everything else on the street and virgin pure. One batch got a High Times write up.
The hallucinations bleed through
Another thing about acid that my buddy DIDN’T tell me was that when you get involved in psychedelics, really weird things start happening around you in real life. Carlos Castenada had a thing or three to say about that. The more you get into acid the weirder things get and it’s not always the acid doing it, at least not hallucination wise. The hallucinations start to bleed into reality. That’s the only way I can account for that bizarre couple of years.
It turned out that those little bottles of liquid LSD weren’t just LSD. They came from a local university which had a chemistry department. The professor had a moonlighting gig on the side, allegedly working for the CIA. Each batch was a blend of LSD, Psilocybin, and Mescaline in different proportions.
We were getting enough once a month to drip out exactly 5,000 hits. Mr. Friendly was sleeping with a nurse so it was no sweat getting an IV drip bottle. One of the great things about acid is it glows in the dark under black light, just like the posters.
We ran down to the office supply store for some desk blotter paper. From there, a trip to the craft store for a wooden stamp. We got one with a dragon on it and the only vegetable dye we could use for ink was red. They got more colors in.
As the months tripped by, we cycled through Red dragon, followed by green, blue, black and purple. Then we got a stamp with a pyramid on it with the eye like the Illuminati symbol. Red, green, blue, black and purple pyramid followed.
That’s when we got the word. The next batch would be the last and the project was over. We went out extra special for that one. A limited edition double dose drip of black and white mandala patterns with a different one on each square of the 4-way. There are rumors some may still exist in a freezer somewhere.
